Cloudy this evening with showers after midnight. Low 67F. Winds ENE at 10 to 15 mph. Chance of rain 50%..

Cloudy this evening with showers after midnight. Low 67F. Winds ENE at 10 to 15 mph. Chance of rain 50%.

After 30 years of ministry and helping raise two daughters, which included driving them to legions of sports outings and dance recitals, seeing them off to college, and celebrating their marriages, one of my retirement goals was to slow down, hurry less, and practice being present in the moment. Some days go well. Others, not so much.

One of those more hurried, impatient occasions occurred not long ago. Headed to an appointment, I whipped into a Starbucks’ drive-thru for my usual white chocolate mocha. Even with three cars in front of me, I was sure I had plenty of time to grab my mocha and make my appointment. Except the line didn’t move as quickly as my patience monitor. Soon, two cars lined up behind me. The ‘70s hit “Stuck in the Middle with You,” by Stealers Wheels, came to mind. No clowns to the left of me or jokers to the right but stuck in the middle, temporarily, I was. I sighed more than a few times, tapped my steering wheel, and watched my dashboard clock.

Then, she caught my eye. Walking down the magnolia-lined sidewalk next to Starbucks and wearing a T-shirt that simply said “Reset,” she stopped for a moment, took a whiff of one of those magnolia blooms, then patiently made her way to wherever she was headed.

Reset. Really? Maybe I didn’t need a billboard. A T-shirt conveyed the message: Slow down. Stop. Smell the magnolias. No amount of tapping or huffing would make the line move any faster. That dashboard clock wasn’t going to speed up or slow down. Eventually the cars ahead of me would move along. Within a few minutes I’d have my mocha. Being late for that appointment wouldn’t be the end of the world, by any means.

Aromatherapy, still a pop culture rage, has been around for thousands of years. Egyptians and Greeks used aromatics for religious, medicinal and esthetic purposes, as did Chinese and Native Americans. Pleasant aromas were believed to heal, appease gods, calm, soothe, even stimulate passion.

Tapping into those calming and soothing aspects, the premise of aromatherapy is that scents stimulate smell receptors in the nose, which send messages to parts of the brain that control emotion. Certain scents can also release stored memories. My maternal grandmother loved to spray on a little “Charlie” before she went out. On rare occasions, when I’ve caught a whiff at church or some other gathering, a fond memory returns. My paternal grandmother used nothing but Ivory soap. Recently, when washing my hands at a friend’s house, the choice of hand soap wasn’t the latest seasonal pump from Bath and Body Works, but mainstay Ivory. The smell and feel of Gran’s soft, scented hands returned, if just for a moment. Talk about a reset.

Scented candles and essential oils continue to be a multi-billion-dollar industry. Our home has its share. Lavender and peppermint invite restful sleep. Blueberry lemonade pump soap reminds us summer is coming to an end, and fall, not far off. And when those cooler, crisp days arrive, out comes the Apple Cinnamon. The aroma from White Linen and Beach Walk candles are not long from being replaced with Country Pumpkin, and later, Frasier Fir. 

Those scents create a nice ambience, maybe even serve to relax on occasion, but the stopping, the resetting, as I was reminded, is perhaps more beneficial than the smelling. And in order to do that, we have to stop the mindless scrolling, put down the phone, take a deep breath, slow down . . . you know the cliche  —  don’t sweat the small stuff. In other words, pay attention  —  to your spouse, your friend, your co-worker who might need an encouraging word. Smile at the wonder of your kids or grandkids, listen to your teenager, trust the insight and wisdom of older adults, and yes, if you can, call your mother, or someone you haven’t connected with in a long time. Leave the house or the office and just sit outside. Pay attention, hit the reset button, laugh, cry, taste, touch, listen, and yes, smell. Life is a gift, ready to be opened every day. And pray for faith, for it too is a gift. 

The Presbyterian minister and writer, Frederick Buechner died recently at the age of 96. A favorite of mine, he once spoke of pulling over and stopping on the side of the road, during a difficult season in his life, just to catch his breath and quiet his mind. A car passed with a license plate bearing the message T-R-U-S-T. Though he confessed the car might have been owned by a trust officer or an estate attorney, Buechner preferred to see the coincidence as a providential gift, because when the car drove by, at that moment, that simple message was timely, welcomed and needed. 

I choose to believe the same about my experience with my magnolia-sniffing friend - a gentle reminder to slow down, to live in the moment. And the next time I’m in the drive-thru at Starbucks, maybe swap my mocha for a pumpkin spice latte. Tis the season! 

Tom Allen is a retired minister who lives in Whispering Pines.

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